I have literally indoctrinated Evan on my 10 commandments for a man. I have a list written out and it is taped on the wall. One he is responsible for reading everyday. The instruction all center around attitude, ability, tenacity and responsibility. I stress that excuses are not allowed. Men make things happen, punks make excuses and he knows all too well that mommy is not raising a punk. So when he comes home and tells me he made 80% on his test, as opposed to a 100% he has to accept responsibility for the shortcoming in achievement. I do not accept any of the excuses he may try, (he ran out of time, Tommy was talking to him, his pencil broke) to those excuses I say, "Let me translate that for you, Evan did not manage his time well today and became distracted, Evan did not silence Tommy when he was interrupting him and decided to be a follower into a conversation and Evan was not prepared for class with only one pencil. See how that works....little boy. You had the ability to choose a different outcome by your CHOICES. The decisions YOU made resulted in the brightest boy in the class getting 80%. If you told me that the test was very hard and you did your best, I would accept that, but to score 20 points below your capability because someone was talking to you or you lost track of time is unacceptable. Period! Make that the last 80% you get for those reasons".

He often looks at me with those big brown eyes wondering why I am so challenging? I tell him all the time, I am preparing him for the real world, not Mommies World at 222 Stye Lane. As a black man, he has to work three times as hard. With our newly elected President, the stakes are higher. A new precedent has been set. Everyone is watching the first fruit to see what manifests. I want my Evan to understand that he is to give his all, all the time. I hate excuses and I hate mediocracy.

On Valentines Day, I saw a little gentleman in the making. When he rose Saturday morning, he knocked on my cracked door and said good morning and asked if he could come in. "Of course", was my response. His face was beaming, he had made me a Valentines Day card and bought me candy from the schools book store. I was very surprised. Later that morning, he went out and picked me a flower out of the yard. He told me that he loved me very much and wanted me to know. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He asked what we were doing and I explained that we would be going to a luncheon and that he would be spending time with friends later. He even had a card for his sister. I was very moved. He told me that he wanted to buy me a card but that he did not have any money and wanted to know if he worked around the house if I would pay him for certain things. Is that the sound of responsibility???? He asked me to write out a list of things he could do to help. He reminded me that he takes out the garbage, brings in the groceries and get Hannah's wipes for her changings and  asked if I was going to put those on the list for pay. "Nope, those are your chores, I do not pay you to do chores that is your contribution to the daily operation of our household. But I will pay you for some other things....I will reward you for going above and beyond. You will not be rewarded for doing what you should do". That is just like a fool told me once that he was an exceptional father because he takes care of his kids. Excuse me? You are supposed to take care of your kids. There is nothing spectacular or exceptional about that. How dumb does that sound? Just imagine me saying "Girl, I fed Hannah today and changed her five times. I even gave her a bath and combed her hair". Now, you would be looking at me like I was crazy!! I am supposed to do that. I do not deserve a Mother of the Year award for actually doing what I am supposed to do.

Okay, I am all over the place in this blog.

I want Evan to understand the importance of hard work and doing his best. I convey that excuses weakens the will of man and should not be tolerated. Instead of making an excuse, find a way to make it happen. He demonstrated that by making me a card when he did not have money to buy one. He showed me that he understands the importance of working and how he can apply work ethic in his seven year old life. Today, before it was time for bed he asked if there was anything he could do for me. I asked him why? He said just because he wanted to be helpful. Look at here, look at here. My commandments are manifesting.............................